Coming up on TEDx and Talks

Asia Sharif 0:00

It's very funny. At networking events I've had um many comments such as, oh were you like one of the videographers? Are you um you know one of the designers? Absolutely not. In fact I built that and it was 0.1% of the world coded in 2020 and out of the 0.1% it was like less than 2% were women of colour and for me that was like shocking.

Asia Sharif 0:22

I remember when I first got diagnosed, I knew it was bad when I walked into the room and there was like two consultants, and I was like, Why is there two consultants and a couple of nurses? Through all those darkest times, the only thing that got me was I kept saying to myself, if I get through this, no, I have to,

Asia Sharif 0:38

It's not you know, it's bit between me and God, like I'm getting through this, but if I don't, then at least that I've did everything that I wanted to do.

Andy Coley 0:45

So, what do you hope to leave people with with your TEDx?

Asia Sharif 0:48

That you do not have to be unbreakable to survive your life.

Title 0:52

This is the TEDx Northern Quarter podcast.

Simran Whitham 0:56

Asia Sharif, award-winning software engineer, DEI advocate, and future TEDx Northern Quarter 2026 speaker. Welcome to the TEDx and Talks podcast by TEDx Northern Quarter.

Asia Sharif 1:12

No, I know, I'm really excited. Thank you so much for

Who is Asia Sharif?

Asia Sharif 1:15

having me.

Simran Whitham 1:15

No, we're looking so forward to seeing you on that stage on September 11th. But for those that are listening and watching this, who is Asia Sharif?

Asia Sharif 1:25

I feel like that's such a broad question.

Andy Coley 1:27

Hey, we're gonna go straight in with a deep one, you know.

Simran Whitham 1:29

Yeah, we're gonna straight. Yeah, who are you? What who are you as a person?

Asia Sharif 1:34

So, Asia Sharif, who am I? So I actually grew up in Liverpool. And after growing up in Liverpool, I decided to move to London to yeah, for my first real job, I guess, I was in sales, if you class that's a real job. But prior that I . Who am I?

Asia Sharif 1:59

I studied law, I dropped out second year, so uni dropout, love that for me. No longer wanted to be a lawyer. I wanted to be something like much more that would um encourage me to actually enjoy like my life and also like enjoy what I'm doing. So yeah, dropped out of uni, moved to London, lived in London for nearly five years, and decided to settle in Manchester. So that's how I ended up here, TEDx Northern Quarter.

Asia Sharif 2:26

And I've been here since 2022. And yeah, I'm a award-winning software engineer, so I'm really into technology. I love coding, I love doing everything to do with technology and inspiring like women and young girls in tech, and to get into tech or into engineering in general. I'm a public speaker, I've spoken multiple stages like in the UK and around the world, and yeah, I'm a massive advocate for diversity, inclusion, neurodiversity, and so much more. So, um, yeah, it's a little bit about myself, but outside that I enjoy life and anything to do with life and travel. So

Simran Whitham 3:05

I think that reflects really much in the content that you put out as well. And you've I think you're downplaying your achievements there a little bit, but it's very hard to condense it all into one little summary. But

Teaching herself to code in lockdown

Simran Whitham 3:16

I just want to touch on something at one. You've had an amazing journey, which we will deep dive deeper into. But can we talk a little bit about like your earlier life, like where it all kind of stems from? Because you taught yourself to code in lockdown, and you did a dramatic career shift throughout lockdown and taught yourself to do something that not a lot of people, especially women, tend to think is a real viable career because it's not really advertised to women as you like to highlight. So, where does your love of technology and what does kind of your earlier upbringing leading you into changing this whole career course and learning to code in lockdown look like?

Asia Sharif 3:51

So, my father was actually an aircraft engineer, so growing up, I I did have you know engineers in the family, and he's super smart, he's also like a hardware engineer, he's just good with anything to do with like computers and hardware.

Asia Sharif 4:05

So I was always like interested in it in general, and then um, so I was exposed to it that way, but I never thought that I could go into it because the school that I went to in Liverpool, a lot of my peers, like it was an all-girls school, and a lot of us we we were kind of just wanting to be other amazing careers, like either a teacher, lawyer, um barristers. None of us ever mentioned, you know, like we were going to be like an engineer, but when I was young, I would always be like, Okay, well, if my father can be an aircraft engineer, I want to work for NASA doing whatever I want to do, and it was just so random.

Asia Sharif 4:40

Now I never actually seen women in engineering or in careers at NASA, for example, from when I was very young. So growing up, I always thought, okay, um, I'm someone who believes in like whatever you put your mind to, you'll do. So after I left home very young when I was like 14, and I ended up in the UK, you can't live on your own at 14.

Asia Sharif 5:05

So I actually had to get fostered. And my foster father is actually a barrister. So I thought, you know what, since he's doing this nice thing of fostering me, um, why don't I be a barrister, you know, to give back? Because you know, he's Nigerian and they absolutely love anything to do with a certificate. He's got like three degrees, honestly. Um, so yeah, so I thought, okay, yeah, I'll be um, I'll be a barrister and it'll make him proud, you know.

Asia Sharif 5:29

So I went to university and I realised even though I love reading, like I'm someone who loves reading, loves writing, that you know, I used to write poetry and everything. Um, and I can condense large amounts of you know, information into like anything really. So I'm good at arguments if I need to. Um, so yeah, I thought, okay, barrister would be the career for me. But then I remember in second year, I thought, surely, like, I can't see myself doing seven years to become a barrister, and seven years in university and studying and doing all the hoops because I'm someone like if I'm gonna aim for a goal, I want to aim very high. So for me, it was like, yeah, I'll aim to be a barrister and then open it in practice. So, but then I thought, no, like I'm not into that, and then I ended up moving to I just dropped out uni, didn't tell anybody, dropped moved to London and just found like a job that supplies accommodations, and so and it was a sales job.

Asia Sharif 6:23

So I thought let me do this for a couple of years, and then lockdown happened. And when lockdown happened by then, when I was in sales, I already started like reading a lot. Um, I you know, I was in a new city, I had to learn to make new friends, I had to learn so many different people. I wasn't no longer the small city of Liverpool. Um, and yeah, this really big world that I was exposed to made me realise wow, there's so much out there just being in London. So yeah, and sales also exposes you to many things, and one thing I'm grateful for is like the mindset shift that I had.

Asia Sharif 6:56

I had I went from like having this very fixed mindset to this really growth mindset, and yeah, I started reading a lot, like some of my favourite books. One was The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth, and another one was psycho-cybernetics, which is all about human behaviour and the growth of the human brain and everything.

Asia Sharif 7:16

And I remember thinking to myself, I haven't pushed myself to see what's like outside my comfort zone or like my full potential, and then lockdown happened, which was very obviously sad and unfortunate with everything that had happened. And at the same time, I took it as an opportunity that I have all this time, I have 24 hours like every single day for God knows how long. I might as well take this opportunity to see how far I can push myself. So I ended up um Googling um, you know, what's like the hardest thing to do. Um, and I came across coding, and I thought, you know, when I was young, I was really interested in engineering. And yes, maybe it was hardware engineering or software engineering or doing something with NASA, like building their rockets somehow.

Asia Sharif 7:59

But I thought, well, I could still start somewhere like as a software engineer. And when I came across that, and I found the first language, I was like, okay, what language is universal and is needed in the future? And I came across like machine learning and robotics, engineering and AI engineering, and it the common uh programming language was Python. So I thought, okay, I'll start with Python. And yeah, so I watched a TEDx talk actually, um, called 'How to Reach Your Most Ambitious Goals', and he talks about um, it's really important at this point because he talks about how every day for an hour for two hours a day he'd walk through Hyde Park, one hour to work, one hour back, and um he listened to German tapes, and after six months he became proficient in German, and nobody believed him, so he took his family to Germany, and he was speaking to everyone fluently, and they all thought, no way, like you actually can speak German, like from just two hours a day.

Asia Sharif 8:53

So I thought, okay, well, I'm gonna apply the same logic. So I'd spend one hour in the morning, one hour in the evening teaching myself Python programming, and until I could get into a flow state where I could do a couple of hours a day, like two to four hour windows.

Asia Sharif 9:07

And I realised, like, wow, I've I've never used I've like awakened a whole side of my brain, like my analytical problem-solving logic side of my brain that I hadn't never awakened before. And I learned something that would probably perceive be perceived as really complex, um, but it wasn't complex, like anybody can learn anything, and that's what it made me realize that anybody if you literally just do something for an hour a day and not think of like how long it'll take you.

Asia Sharif 9:35

And in my case, six months later, I was in a position where I could apply for software engineering roles, and I was started mentoring and you know, public speaking and just my journey, and it was so fresh, and you know, but I was just couldn't believe, I guess, that wow, it's just something so small can change the whole trajectory of your entire life, and yeah, and then that's kind of like my lockdown journey where I went from uh teaching myself to code within 12 months getting my first software engineering role and then winning like my first award as well, um, to like where I am now, and that was lockdown was 2020, so six years ago, and obviously so much has occurred since my career has completely you know expedited since which has been amazing.

Simran Whitham 10:26

I mean, uh was it the challenge that drew you to specifically software engineering? Because a lot of people in lockdown, like I took up gardening, and I love gardening, I love growing my own stuff. But you took on, as you said, something very untraditional, a lot of people would perceive it as hard, and you'd had no obviously I know you come from an engineering-inspired upbringing, but was it the challenge that drew you to a software engineering, or was it the fact why did you go, I want the hardest thing humanely possible, two hours a day? Like, not a lot of people want to chase something that is deliberately really difficult.

Simran Whitham 11:02

And in lockdown, my first thought was I want to grow my own food because I'm locked up here, the supermarkets are running out of strawberries, and I really want to learn how to grow strawberries. So, what was it that made you just go, I want the hardest thing that I can think of? Was it a particular thing you saw, maybe some content you'd consumed, or was it literally just you saw it and went, I want to do that?

Asia Sharif 11:23

Yeah, it was a challenge because you know, like I said, I started like really educating myself. I'd watch a lot of TEDx talks, I'd read a lot, and I always thought, well, you know, if they can achieve whatever they've achieved in their lives, whether it be like financial, mental, physical success, you know, TEDx has many different speakers from different types of successes. I thought, well, I want to do something that really challenged, and I felt like I was in a plateau in myself anyway, and I'd never challenge myself like education-wise or like academically, like where how far can I like push my brain and what is it capable of doing?

Asia Sharif 11:58

And in the future, maybe I will build something, you know, like that's one of my goals to open a tech startup, and in the future I may be able to do that. So the challenge, but also I came across statistics at the time, and it was 0.1% of the world coded in 2020, and out of the 0.1%, it was like less than 2% were women of colour, and for me that was like shocking because it was like wow! So that also gave me the like drive to not only continue the career, but I told myself that you know, if if I do make it as a software engineer, that I don't want to just stop there, just you know, getting the role.

Asia Sharif 12:37

I want to also inspire other women who look like me, because again, I didn't have that growing up like a woman who would look like me or from same religious background, so on and so forth, wasn't you know within my reach at the time. And when now we have LinkedIn, which is great, you know, you can just type self-engineering and pick out the females that you want to like reach out to and ask about their career journeys, but then it was not like that, so I thought now I'm going to then build my personal brand and visibility so that women would know. Hey, like there's a lot of actually us, well, there might not be a lot, but there's some of us who are really in who are in engineering, and you can do it too, and it's a very difficult journey, and it was a difficult journey, you know. I faced multiple rejections, failures, like all sorts in that 12 months. But I would do it again and again and again. It was just patience really and challenged, so yeah.

Andy Coley 13:29

Yeah, it's interesting, isn't it? I um have you ever watched the film Hidden Figures? I'm sure you probably have. It's about the mathematicians that are involved in NASA. Yeah. Um about how to get the rockets up and back down safely how many people, particularly women of colour, were involved in the background, but were never seen or hidden in terms of the work that they did um to support that.

Andy Coley 13:49

And I'm sure there have been so many fantastic women out there doing awesome work. Um coding's not that difficult, Simran. I'm gonna talk about this as a as a coder myself. Um it's just it always appears difficult until you get your head into it. It's logical. You've got a logical brain, I find coding is quite logical.

Simran Whitham 14:04

I was just gonna

Andy Coley 14:04

say we'll talk about for, you know, 'for next loops' and 'if... then' later, if you want to.

Simran Whitham 14:09

I can't think of anything worse than that conversation. But yeah, again, I'm very left analytical, I'm very creative style brain. Whereas I because I was dyscalculia growing up, so I always struggled with mathematics anyway. But maybe I also just had really bad coding teachers. I studied game design, so you kind of had to be good at coding, and yet coding was the one thing that I really struggled with.

Simran Whitham 14:29

So for people like me, it looks like the most difficult thing ever. But then programmers and engineers like you just make it look so accessible, which I do have to say, you I really respect like how accessible you've made it look for you, like you'd beat every stereotype and every image of what a software engineer looks like because you're very fashionable, you've got a very good sense of style, personal taste, and when people think software engineers, even when they think women, typically, because in the games industry, we it's still very high proportion of male-dominated, but it has got better over the years. But your style and everything you do, I feel like you've brought a fresher breath, sorry, breath of fresh air to that role.

Simran Whitham 15:12

Because when people think software engineers, they don't think this very stylish, just amazing, personal brand, award-winning, self-driven, very confident individual. And you just I think you just make it look really attractive in that sense because like, yeah, I'm breaking down those stereotypes and those barriers.

Breaking stereotypes in technology

Simran Whitham 15:32

Asia Sharif 15:32

Yeah, no, I totally agree. I think it's the way I see it is society for some reason has created like images of certain careers. Yeah. And I try, well, no, I do always try and uh like stay away from the societal like norms or what something is meant to look like or what they perceive, uh, you know, for example, engineer or like their version of beauty is and so on and so forth.

Asia Sharif 15:59

So um, you know, a lot of my friends, a lot of us were in in engineering and technology, CEOs, and all sorts. And again, we always get stereotyped, it's very funny. At networking events, I've had um many comments such as, Oh, were you like one of the videographers? Are you um you know one of the designers? Absolutely not. In fact, I built that or I did this, you know. But and then you see their face, they're so shocked and confused.

Asia Sharif 16:26

And I think what's so confusing is because you've stayed in a box, you know, there's like a theory, you stay in a box, and you refuse to like see outside the box that there's way more, and people come in all different shapes, sizes, looks, and everything. But because you've got this box where you've purposely just kept like stayed on the rock inside, and you don't want to expand your like imagination, and then obviously people become shocked.

Asia Sharif 16:51

And it's like, no, you don't need to be shocked. I wish we live in a society where people are just accepting of what you know what everyone looks like, no matter what industry they're in, and accept that yeah, people come in different forms.

The myth of strength

Asia Sharif 17:05

Andy Coley 17:05

So tell us a little bit more about your TEDx then. What's the theme of your TEDx? What are you gonna be speaking about on the stage in as we're recording this just a few weeks' time?

Asia Sharif 17:15

It's all about the myth of strength. So it's about deconstructing and breaking down how society deems strength it should be. So uh my belief is you know, uh the society in the world we live in believes that strength you should be perceived as strong and you know, keep a good brave face and turn up and do what you you need to do and really not ask for help and you may be perceived weak, especially in the corporate world.

Asia Sharif 17:48

I'm in the corporate world and uh male-dominated industries and stuff, especially even as females, like if you somehow perceive yourself like come across weak, it can like hinder your trajectory. Yeah. Um, but I don't believe in that. So like I said earlier, I love breaking the norm. So I will continue to do that. So I break the break it down and I talk I go to go on to talk about um what I believe strength should be, which is asking for help, is letting people in. It doesn't mean you know you need to air out everything about yourself at all. It's just about actually when you need somebody, when you need that help.

Asia Sharif 18:30

I think it's really important to let people in and to know when you do need help and then also where you it does help you with success in the future as well. I definitely believe that as a community, if everyone was open and authentic, we'd be a lot more successful than how we are now, hidden and yeah, so I don't believe in that.

Andy Coley 18:53

And through your sort of life to where you are right now, you talk about that concept of breaking things down, sort of recoding, rebuilding them. What which aspects of you paid attention to for yourself that had the greatest impact to who Asia is right now?

Asia Sharif 19:09

Yeah, I think um I think two main things. One is growing up in foster care. When people hear of a foster child, again, it's like a l a lot of reactions are normally, oh, you know, they're troubled or they may not get to where there'll be in the statistics out there where a lot of unfortunate foster children don't get to where they need to be, maybe because of the environment, right? So whenever I hear these, you know, societal views, I always think, well, here I'm an example who grew up in foster care and I break the norms of what society deems a foster child, you know, would look like, would come across, or would end up in ten years' time.

Asia Sharif 19:54

And I push further for that because I think it's really important that obviously one, we change our views, but two, um I think when it comes to the myth of strength, I would always ask for help like growing up, you know, I'd speak to my social workers, I'd speak to my foster par uh foster parents, I would speak to my teachers and tell them my goals, my dreams, my aspirations. I never felt shame about like my position or where I was at in life. And I think that that's like that was really important for me.

Asia Sharif 20:23

And then later on in life, because because I had that community, that love, that support, so it that safe space to be whoever, it provided me all this stability, it probab provided me with like dreams that endless, you know. So later on in life, I then applied that same, you know, thought and logic and just how I am, where I lean on to my

Stage 4 cancer and learning to ask for help

Asia Sharif 20:48

community. Because later on in life, three years ago, I actually got diagnosed with stage four Hodgkin lymphoma, which is a type of blood cancer. And you know, throughout my entire life I had more, you know, adversities, obstacles, you know, you name it, but you always have for me anyway, I always had a structure. I was always, you know, I have a structure, I have a plan, I protect myself from anything that can occur, you know. Um,

Asia Sharif 21:15

But life decides to always test that theory, and uh stage four cancer was thrown in, and you can't you can't build around that, you can't create no, you know, structure. And for again during that time, because I it kept coming back, it came back three times.

Asia Sharif 21:31

I remember there was a particular time where I had to go on the news and ask for help, and for some reason I felt shame. I was like, why would I go on the news and ask for help? Because I needed the stem cell donor, and with my heritage, I'm a mixed heritage, half Moroccan, half Somali. It's extremely rare to find a stem cell match. It's like zero to none to find a stem cell match for somebody like myself, and I thought, how can I do that?

Asia Sharif 21:57

Because I've built six the past six years my career. I've built all this self-respect. I've earned all this respect. And you know, I'm looked up to as like a leader, as a, you know, like a mentor, someone people can lean on. And now stage four cancer. And it's like I'm in a male-dominated industry. I'm in the corporate world. I'm in this gigantic industry. And I don't want to be perceived as like weak just because I'm going through something that you know a lot of people would see as extreme hardship. And may also see it as you know something that can hinder your future. And I just switched my mindset and thought, no, what I'm going to do is, yeah, I'm going to get in front of that camera and ask for help. I need a stem cell match because I want to live, firstly. So I did exactly that.

Asia Sharif 22:43

And second of all, um, I'm going to lean on my community and I'm going to still thrive. So, you know, I'd you'd find me in hospitals um doing tech talks online virtually. And that doesn't mean every cancer patient needs to do that at all. I just thought, why not? You know, I could either be very sad at my situation or I could live still try and live my life.

Asia Sharif 23:06

So, you know, if I had things I was really passionate about, I'd still do it. If I needed to mentor, if I needed to do like a public speaking gig, I would do that for just virtually, I'd just adjust everything. And yeah, that hardship uh made me realise how much leaning on my community, asking for help, putting myself in a vulnerable position, just the act of vulnerability in itself is actually one of the most beautiful things that you can do.

Asia Sharif 23:31

Because I definitely believe there's so much beauty and like resilience and you know, hardship and adversity. I think see the beauty in it.

Asia Sharif 23:38

And in Islam, there's a particular quote and it's uh in the Quran, I'm Muslim, and it says, you know, 'with hardship there's ease', and a lot of people in the Islamic community sometimes misinterpret it with that after the hardship ease comes. But during one of my Quran lessons, I learned that during the hardship there's ease, and that's what got me through uh stage four cancer because yes, I had stage four cancer, and yes, I was going to chemo, and yes, it kept coming back every day, and you know, and yes, I had all these worries. But if I looked around, I had the roof over my head, I had so much ease. I was, you know, in private healthcare, so I had um food in my stomach, I had like a a great life.

Asia Sharif 24:22

So, how can I how can I focus on the hardship and there's all this ease around me, and I can just use it to give back, so yeah, I think that kind of really helped me, and then it shaped my talk to myth of strength.

Simran Whitham 24:34

And on your cancer journey, so your cancer journey is actually how I'd found / met you years ago. So I was there the day you won your This Is Manchester Award, and I remember briefly meeting you on the night because Zara I think I came up to you to congratulate you. I know you were very emotional that night as well. You were crying, talking about how much it meant to you to win that, and you've won many awards since then. Huge kudos to you.

Simran Whitham 24:58

And after that, I watched you because you documented quite a lot of your cancer journey, and it was terrifying for me as a viewer because obviously I've lost family members to cancer, I've watched people go through it. I watched my granddad, who was my dad, with wither away to cancer and die. And I can see that what you went through was really terrifying. You lost your hair, you went through all the treatments. I saw the video of when you rang the bell when they gave you the all clear.

Simran Whitham 25:27

If you're comfortable talking about it, what did those early days when you first got that diagnosis look like? And you're here now, you're incredibly successful. But as we know, there's Instagram versus reality. On your darkest days when you were going through that, what got you through it?

Simran Whitham 25:47

Because resilience and the myth of strength you've talked about, obviously, but we all need that little something that gets us through those darkest days. And for you, what was what did those early days of the diagnosis look like? And then how what got you through the worst of it, would you say?

Asia Sharif 26:03

Yeah, no, I'm sorry again for your loss. Obviously, you know, for a lot of people to cancer, and it's it's it's very it can be very tragic. Um, and then at the same time, you know, there's like I said, there's beauty when you see people get through it and ring the bell. Um

Asia Sharif 26:19

And for my for myself, like I remember when I first got diagnosed, I already knew I had cancer. It was just about advocating to get um diagnosed finally. But I knew it was bad when I walked into the room and there was like two consultants, and I was like, Why is there two consultants and a couple of nurses? And I thought, what are they going to tell me? Because you know, I was in the Christie Cancer Center and my consultant's looking at me and he's you know struggling to look at me, and I sit down and he says, you know, wow, see, I thought it was stage two, but it's actually stage four.

Asia Sharif 26:54

When you hear stage four, you think, oh, you know, it's the end, like it's incurable. But I didn't even think that, which is so weird. I think because I have so much faith in like God. I just thought, you know, what's meant to be will be. And I've always been someone who just believes in like the now, in the present. I don't think about six months' time, and I don't think about yesterday. I just think of the now.

Asia Sharif 27:15

So when they told me, I was like, amazing. So, like, you know, is it like how long? Like a prognosis. And he looked at me and he started laughing. He was like, let's let's figure out a treatment plan. And I thought, amazing. So you're somebody like me who just focuses on the now, you know. Um, and that was helpful, but of course, there was dark days like key. I think what it's not the cancer that is the worst part, it's the chemo, the chemotherapy, the radiotherapy. Like it nearly killed me so many times.

Asia Sharif 27:44

I remember the first regime I had, it was called ABVD. It was horrific, like I couldn't get through, it was burning through my skin. I still have scars on my arm. Um, and you know, my even my doctor, my nurse was shedding tears at some point because I was genuinely begging them to die because the side effects were just horrific. And after the third time, they realised, you know what, ethically they can't put me through this regime anymore. And you know, at that point I was still stage four cancer, so you know, they then switched to a a different treatment called Via COPDAC 21, which is like some form of German treatment, is the highest dose that you can give someone, and that required me to stay in the Christie's a lot, and that worked, but the side effects again were substantial.

Asia Sharif 28:29

You know, I had extreme weight gain, I went from like 65 kilograms to 105 kilos. Um, I lost so much of myself, like my hair, eyebrows, things that I guess before I never was challenged by. You know, you you never think physicality is something that's important, but it stripped me from everything I was out. Like I was completely naked, I couldn't get any more naked than what I was, you know, um as a physical person. Um, and I completely lost myself, like I didn't know who I was anymore. Um, and then obviously all the pain, I can't even describe the pain and the joint issues and everything that comes with that.

Asia Sharif 29:11

And then I wouldn't leave the house. Uh 2024, I would just stay in in the I lived in Deansgate in the apartments, and I would not leave my apartment, even in the heat. I would stay there because I was so embarrassed. I came across all these challenges now that I didn't realise I had like embarrassment, shame, you know. I didn't know how to wear a wig, I didn't know how to put a wig on. You know, I had this big luscious curly hair, and now I don't have this. That's all I've ever known is to do my curly hair routine every day. To now I have to learn how to install a wig and who to go to. Um and it was just as simple as that I can't just pop to the corner shop because I have to put a wig on. If I don't put a wig on, people stare at you, and you know, obviously you have no eyebrows, really obvious.

Asia Sharif 29:55

You have the steroid face, the moon steroid face, obviously you're going through some sort of cancer. Um, and I also hated how people looked at me. They always looked at me that feeling very sorry, and like also I was very overweight, so I couldn't really walk much. I couldn't walk a couple of minutes without like dripping in sweat, and that was a chemo side effect, so that was really difficult. So I never left my apartment for about a year, which caused extreme like social anxiety, so having to relearn to live.

Asia Sharif 30:22

And then the cherry on top was I had a stem cell transplant, so I thought I'd been through all that, and then I had a stem cell transplant because we were treatment of two years at this point last year, and there was I was in there for 30 days, and my doctor said to me, He said, If you hated me at any point in the last two years, you're going to hate me. Like you are going to, you know, not want to be here, and I just need to warn you that it is absolutely horrific what you're gonna embark on.

Asia Sharif 30:50

I thought, what's he on about? You know, I've did every side effect you could possibly think of. Like, you know, I'm myself someone who should experiment with the side effects I had. And when I had the stem cell transplant, he was not joking.

Asia Sharif 31:02

That was absolute hell. Like I genuinely thought I was going to die, and you know, I didn't speak, I didn't move, I had to relearn to sit up. I didn't realise like muscles hold you up, I couldn't sit up. Um, I didn't eat for a month. The you know what that does to a human anyway. Like I completely just like withered away on this bed. And through all those darkest times, the only thing that got me was I kept saying to myself, if I get through this, now I have to, it's not you know, it's between me and God, like I'm getting through this. But if I don't, then at least that I've did everything that I wanted to do at the time during my life.

Asia Sharif 31:38

And I chose myself so many times, then I told myself that the only goal I had was I would pray every single night, like in the bed. I couldn't move, and I would be like, God, please allow me to get through just so that I can have one more walk or you know, one more time where I can like climb a mountain and like see the sunset and sunrise and like detach from this. We say the dunya, which is like the world. I'll detach from this worldly goods, so I can just enjoy the true peace of like the world.

Just let me see one more sunrise

Asia Sharif 32:06

So I would literally be praying, like, just allow me to see one more sunset, one more sunrise, and then you can take me like it's totally fine. And I feel like just the dream of just seeing like a sunrise somewhere in the world, anywhere, um got me through it, uh, which obviously then ties in with faith because my hot sole belief while everyone around me was worried was well, you know, at least if I see one more sunrise, that's what matters.

Asia Sharif 32:33

And I knew it's bad when my nurses were crying, my nurses never cry. Um so yeah, and then I got through it and since I've done nothing but travel. I'm not here, uh you know, and I've seen many sunrises and sunsets. So I always say to myself, if it ever comes back, you know, at least I can look back and say the last this is one year now, cancer-free.

Asia Sharif 32:53

This last seven months, especially, I've seen so many parts of the world and met so many people and experiences and did things I never even thought I'd do, even with all the pain and side effects, I still suffer. Um, and I'm grateful.

Asia Sharif 33:05

So it's definitely allowed me to see the world in much more different place and from a place of humility. And I feel like that's why I always do things for like the greater good. It all ties back to that.

Andy Coley 33:17

So, what would you say to people if they feel that their background, race, circumstances around their health um has sort of put a ceiling on them? How would you encourage them to see past that and beyond and through the now into the what's next?

Asia Sharif 33:35

Yeah, um for myself, what really helped was um having a plan and having number one a plan. So a goal. So I always goal set like six months and twelve months and twenty-four months, but I don't look at them, I write it down in a letter and I leave it. After that, I focus on the present. So if you're going through a hardship but you have this goal that you want, right? So at the time my hardship was, you know, lockdown, not knowing where I'm gonna live. I'm like sort of dealing with homelessness, staying at my foster brothers.

Asia Sharif 34:08

But I had this goal, I'm gonna be a software engineer, but I'm not gonna stop there. I'm gonna be, you know, uh uh award-winning, uh a mentor, help, and everything that I can possibly do to inspire like the next generation. I had this really this is a huge goal. So, and even though I had those adversities of like homelessness and everything, I thought I told myself, let's focus on the now.

Asia Sharif 34:29

What what can I do today? So I would use Trello and I I use it every day and I split it into two sections. So the first section would be like my morning routine, what I need to get done. So if you can go to the gym, go gym. If you can't, at least get a walk-in, move your body somehow, like you you need your health, right?

Asia Sharif 34:46

So I would start with that and I would take it off, and then my anything to do with like self-care would be done early in the morning, and then I would go on to this uh split in two parts. The second part would be what I can do today for the goal that I want in six months. So, for example, if it was to switch careers and it was soft engineering, my second part would consist of one hour problem solving, one hour reading like a book on problem solving, one hour coding, and I would get that done, you know, in that day.

Asia Sharif 35:13

And before you know it, if you just focus on these small steps, it's very small goals each day, and on with the hardship that you're facing, whether it is stage four cancer, whether it is homelessness or some sort of adversity, because you're not looking at the bigger goal, you'll get through, you know, in six months' time, you'll look back and you'll be like, Oh my gosh, I did all of this, these small steps, and now I'm here.

Asia Sharif 35:36

So for me, even when I was going through cancer, I had many goals. I'd focus, okay, today I have chemo. This is what I need to do for my self-care, and this is the rest days I need, and I would split it. If I had to look at chemo, I'd look at the week instead of the day.

Asia Sharif 35:50

Because if I had chemo on the Monday, the side effects would kick in three days later. So I knew I had three days from the Monday to the Wednesday to fulfil my daily goals that would help me get to my six-month goal. So Monday to Wednesday would be doing things that I need to do, whether it's career-wise, mental-wise, physical-wise, from the Wednesday, that's blocked off. I'm I'm sick and I'm recovering Monday, uh, Wednesday to however long it takes me.

Asia Sharif 36:15

And then it's also taken away like the feeling guilt, because that can come sometimes when you have these big goals, you know, guilt. And then also dealing with like imposter syndrome. I think like imposter syndrome, feeling that you might not be able to get through or you might not be good enough, or something, whether it's a hardship, you feel like, oh, it's not I'm not gonna be able to make it, yeah. You have to just put it's a thought, you can accept the thought, and I do do that. I'm like, okay, I feel this right now, but I remind myself feelings are temporary.

Asia Sharif 36:44

So if I sit, if I force it's up to me whether I sit in this feeling. And if I sit in this feeling, what's going to happen in five hours time, I'm gonna still be in the feeling in the same position. But if I accept the feeling for like five minutes or whatever your time for me, it's like 15 minutes, and I accept it for 15 minutes. I write about it, and then after 15 minutes, sorry, I have to get up. I want to continue.

Asia Sharif 37:07

Life is so much more, you know. And then I do that. So I hope that that would like help somebody if they have any goals whilst facing hardship is structure, breaking things down and accepting the now and like where you are now and who you are now and what you're facing without the guilt and

You don’t have to be unbreakable

Asia Sharif 37:22

shame, you know.

Andy Coley 37:24

Awesome. And if you've got sort of one hope that you hope people take away from your talk specifically, what would you love to leave people with as a legacy from your talk? Like your talk could be a talk somebody else is talking about on the TEDx so that they're doing in the future. So, what do you hope to leave people with with your TEDx?

Asia Sharif 37:42

That you do not have to be unbreakable to survive your life.

Asia Sharif 37:50

I think that's really important.

Andy Coley 37:51

Yeah. Awesome.

Simran Whitham 37:53

I love that. Now, thank you, Asia, for joining us. But before you go, we have a tradition on this podcast, and what I would like to introduce you to this is the TEDx Northern Quarter Red Journal. And what happens on this is that at the end of every podcast, we ask the previous guest to leave a question, an idea, or a thought for the next person to answer.

Simran Whitham 38:18

Now, there is a question that has been left for you, but I'm not gonna tell you who left this question for you because funnily enough, Andy, this was actually left for us in the old podcast one that I didn't add into the red journal. So I'm not gonna tell you who left this for you. It's on my phone ironically because I haven't copied it into this journal. But

Simran Whitham 38:40

The question that was left for you was, and I'll tell you who asked it to you afterwards, was...

Simran Whitham 38:45

"If someone gave you access to unlimited resources and finances to support one dream completely unchained and unhindered, what would that dream be and why would you choose to pursue it?"

Asia Sharif 39:08

What a beautiful question. Strip poverty from the world. The entire world I would strip poverty and try and deconstruct um power from the world so everyone's free and able to live freely without poverty. It's really important.

Simran Whitham 39:39

As someone from a council of state, thank you for that one.

Simran Whitham 39:42

Would you like to know who asked you that question?

Asia Sharif 39:44

Yeah, yeah.

Simran Whitham 39:46

Emma Gaskin, your speaker coach, left that question for you to answer.

Asia Sharif 39:50

Ah, she's amazing. Yeah, well have you.

Andy Coley 39:52

What's it been like working through the whole process of doing a TEDx talk?

Asia Sharif 39:56

It you know, because it's such a big dream. It was a lot of pressure at first. Because you chase this dream sometimes, and I definitely found myself, you know, sometimes I'd go like a whole year where I would apply for TEDx talks, but the minute I stopped, it came to me, you know, like when I met you. Yeah, I stopped.

Asia Sharif 40:14

This is also another thing why you need to not think of long-term goals, just let it be. It's in your mind and your subconscious, and you know, I um so at first it was like, oh my gosh, this dream has caught the blue. This is a dream I had put behind me like three years ago. So um now I whereas now it's like with all the help I've had from Emma and yourselves, it's completely changed.

Asia Sharif 40:38

Just I don't know, my whole perspective that I'm not again, it ties in with my talk, I'm not doing it alone. You get a community, you lean on your community, and they help you. Um they provide you with the tools that you need, and you help also meet them halfway and take those tools.

Asia Sharif 40:53

And now I feel like I've written and I'm gonna have a very beautiful TEDx talk thanks to yourselves, the community, and Emma.

Asia Sharif 41:02

What a great question.

Andy Coley 41:03

Thanks, so much, Asia.

Asia Sharif 41:05

Thank you. Thanks so much for having me.